And as a rule we don’t bother addressing them because they’re so demented you could spend 5,000 words pulling apart all the individual strands of lunacy every time, and lunatics thrive on attention, but this one does merit a very brief comment.
Because “Vote Labour, get indy” wasn’t our plan. It was John Swinney’s.
Even by the embarrassing standards of The National, the gulf between this morning’s blaring front-page splash and the weak, watery weasel words in the actual article is a chasm so wide and so yawning (in every sense of that word) that it would put the epic planetary scar of Mars’ Valles Marineris to shame.
Coupled with a feebly underwhelming Programme For Government (in which the main policy was the re-abolition of peak rail fares just months after the SNP insisted such a move was unaffordable, with no clue as to where the money had suddenly been found) and a pitiful list of candidates for next year’s Holyrood election featuring the likes of Sally “all aboard the gravy bus!” Donald, Kaukab “DECAPITATE TERFS” Stewart, Kirsten “DECAPITATE TERFS” Oswald, Alison “DECAPITATE TERFS” Thewliss and Alyn “throw anyone who doesn’t want to DECAPITATE TERFS out of the SNP” Smith, the story was an abject vision of a bleak future for independence.
On reflection, we feel we may have not taken this story seriously enough. After all, they don’t put just ANY old guff on the front page of the Sunday Mail.
The less said about the Scottish Government’s toe-curlingly embarrassing “summit” last week, the sooner we can all pretend it never happened. We’ve got little to add to the withering assessments of Robin McAlpine and Kevin McKenna and just about everyone else who’s bothered covering this pathetic waste of everyone involved’s time. (Not that the time of most of these worthless quangocrats was worth anything anyway.)
We take a moment only to note something remarkable: the closest Scottish Labour’s hapless branch manager Anas Sarwar has ever come to understanding anything.
Yesterday the Scottish media gave Scottish Greens MSP Maggie Chapman what she’s never willingly given anyone else – a platform on which to make her case.
Most did a very poor job challenging her on her outrageous comments about the Supreme Court, with BBC Radio Scotland’s Drivetime show being an especially wretched example of allowing the interviewee to ignore every question and then just ramble on endlessly about something else entirely, but LBC’s Gina Davidson was on top of her brief and put all the points that reasonable people wanted to be made, while giving Chapman ample time to answer uninterrupted.
Let’s break down how that went, with the help of our handy Bullshit Buzzer.
At the weekend, Scottish Greens MSP Maggie Chapman was filmed applauding as a notoriously unhinged transactivist ranted through a megaphone to a small and almost exclusively male crowd of protestors about how he was going to openly break the law by continuing to use women’s public toilets, and addressing JK Rowling with the words “We should all take a shite on you, you heinous creeping old bitch”.
At another protest, Chapman herself asserted that the Supreme Court’s unanimous ruling on the correct interpretation of the Equality Act 2010 was motivated by not by a solemn consideration of the law or by the arguments of counsel who appeared before it, but by “bigotry, prejudice and hatred”.
Chapman is – incredibly – Deputy Convener of the Equalities, Human Rights and Civil Justice Committee of the Scottish Parliament, and as such her comments sparked a storm of wholly justified outrage over her flagrant breach not only of Parliamentary rules but also of the law – specifically the Judiciary and Courts (Scotland) Act 2008, which requires all MSPs to uphold the independence of the judiciary.
Regular readers of Wings won’t need any reminding that Dani Garavelli of the Herald is, among some very stiff competition, one of the most contemptible pieces of nightsoil currently operating in the Scottish media.
But if you’re new here, we can give you a quick illustration.
If the sneering piety of that opening paragraph made you feel a little revolted, a bit angry and somewhat nauseous, then congratulations, because that means you’re still something minimally approximating to a decent human being. But unfortunately it gets a lot worse from there.
Sven on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “100%Yes Wish no more … I’m guessing you’ve just managed to get his back up, more bristly than a stickleback…” May 9, 09:36
Dan on All Or Nothing: “Aye, good post Robert. I only drop in occasionally now as the latest site change means it’s now back to…” May 9, 09:30
desimond on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “It must be so cosy when youre part of ‘The system’. The lovely warm feeling inside as your eyes slowly…” May 9, 09:28
Andy Ellis on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Hardly a surprise surely? As polling consistently shows, you can expect around 10% of those polled to vote for virtually…” May 9, 09:17
Anthem on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “OT. Has anyone actually noticed that the English government has provided £600m to support a project that steals energy from…” May 9, 08:42
Chas on All Or Nothing: “Maybe I could get a loan of yours Sam? I hear that it has hardly been used!” May 9, 08:15
Chas on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “The last time I looked, there is an arsehole on WGD who constantly provides copies of polls and attempts to…” May 9, 08:03
Hatey McHateface on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Hmmm. The BBC News (waves to Marie) is constantly full of examples of people being treated abominably. I’m afraid I…” May 9, 07:49
Hatey McHateface on All Or Nothing: “Hail Confused, full of shite. Don’t you want to know which school I went to? You need to get back…” May 9, 07:33
Yoon Scum on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Who do I vote for if I don’t want open borders immigration and I don’t want the North Sea to…” May 9, 07:17
Yoon Scum on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “I’ve never seen you call out the moon howlers who are calling for English heads on spikes. Maybe you should…” May 9, 07:06
Yoon Scum on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Brexit causes you a MAJOR problem with your campaign They promised instant wealth and total freedom as the Eu would…” May 9, 06:24
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on All Or Nothing: “Tentative translation of the Marquis of Montrose quatrain: He either fears his fate too much, Or his deserts are small,…” May 8, 23:10
Confused on All Or Nothing: “hail mia, full of grace, the lord is with thee … jesus was “antisemitic” : Ye are of YOUR FATHER…” May 8, 22:52
Lorn on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “I think, Mia, the traditional Scottish Unionist vote and UKReform do not a double act make. They are coming from…” May 8, 22:51
Lorn on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Neither, Hatey. It doesn’t have to be above 48% before a campaign starts. Calling the bluff of both Holyrood and…” May 8, 22:45
Lorn on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “Your tedious nonsense might apply to some nationalists, but, for the majority, we are very well aware that independence will…” May 8, 22:39
Hatey McHateface on All Or Nothing: “Understood. I’m gonna assume that “wanking on and on” is an order of magnitude more serious than “wanging on” 🙂” May 8, 22:17
Rev. Stuart Campbell on All Or Nothing: “Y’know, I’m not sure you were ever voting Yes, mate.” May 8, 21:50
Rev. Stuart Campbell on All Or Nothing: “Fucksake, what do I have to DO to stop you people fucking wanking on and on about Israel and Palestine?…” May 8, 21:49
Hatey McHateface on All Or Nothing: “Woo, check out the big guts on Mia. She’s standing by her words. There’s your route to Indy right there.…” May 8, 21:39
Mia on All Or Nothing: ““The problem is the number of plants [in Hollyrood] working for the USA’s deep state and for the rogue state…” May 8, 21:06
Mia on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “I am actually very surprised the Green vote remains that stubbornly high after their many cock ups with the return…” May 8, 20:58
Hatey McHateface on All Or Nothing: “Aw, quick everybody, look at Mia. If frantic virtue signalling could give you wings, she’d have enough lift to carry…” May 8, 20:53
Mia on All Or Nothing: ““It’s people like you that stopped me voting YES” Yes to what? It is trolls like you and Hatey what…” May 8, 20:50
Vivian O’Blivion on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “RefUK friendly polling outfit Find Out Now have the Faragists on a thirteen percentage point lead! Westminster voting intention, field…” May 8, 20:26
Yoon Scum on All Or Nothing: “Mia It’s people like you that stopped me voting YES And I use the term “people” in it’s loosest meaning” May 8, 20:16
Mia on All Or Nothing: ““an openly unashamed antisemite” If, according to you, the new meaning of the word “antisemite” is to feel sick at,…” May 8, 19:58
100%Yes on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “He keeps having a go at Alba Party. Bitter nice as a drink, it must be hell for someone who’s…” May 8, 19:58
Yoon Scum on The Last Thing They’ll Expect: “The biggest tell that a NAT isn’t very bright is they cannot give one single reason to stay in the…” May 8, 19:52
